I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
You've changed since you got that strap on
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Randomize
