That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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