A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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