All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
