The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
im having a threesome with these popsicles
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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