He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
