I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize