Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
did you just send me my own nude
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I supernannyed him into submission
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
