I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
