Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Randomize
