no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
