she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Randomize
