Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
People in love make me want to vomit
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
