4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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