I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
