dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
