I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
