Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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