i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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