Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
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