Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Randomize
