Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
