the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
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