It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
