Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
just come out here and I will go home with you...
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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