And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
