who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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