I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
