North Korea, Best Korea!
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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