Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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