Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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