He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
