I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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