She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
