her vagina looked like bernie madoff
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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