I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize