Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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