wat bout pragnant strippers??
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
