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My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize