I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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