I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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