maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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