I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
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I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
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Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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