so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
