I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize