smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
