YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize