ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
All I want is dick and wine.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
