Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
