she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
